handjob tips. give me some.
birth control and beer are two of the most beautiful creations ever invented.
Do fat girls normaly have fat that look like a penis by their pussy?
What the hell did you do last night?!
he couldn't find his key, so we just had sex on his parent's porch while we waited for his mom to get home.
i've decided to use this saturday afternoon to take care of my pube situation
Also, we just got yelled at by a cop for being awesome...or making out in a fountain. Whatever.
RA chick in a Christmas onsie chased us up 5 flights of stairs. I need to stop violating guest policy
I was talking about you wanting my dick, but that works too
You yelled "Everybody!!! Round of applause to Jill for not doing anal!!" Right in front of him.
So the revenge porn my ex posted just resulted in a contract with a gay porn company. I'm going to make $8,000 this weekend. That would a breakup checkmate. Are you joining me in the legislative committee hearing tomorrow?
We kind of crashed their funeral party. Oops.
HIS DICK IS SO AWESOME DUDE. 15/10 SURPRISE
By 9 pm this evening I'll have accomplished smashing with two different guys in two different time zones in the same day.
Stay hydrated
Imma make him fuck me with my jersey on tonight while I chant Go Jets Go. Gotta love playoff hockey szn.
You're an adult now and it's your vagina. You should do what it or you wants.
Randomize
