What I'm saying is Afghanistan is America's sexually contracted disease.
I just fell for a fake 50 dollar bill in a urinal. Fuck pittsburgh
I don't even want to think what you did to boys being that drunk and horny.
Then I wouldn't suggest looking at the pictures from last night.
I took my pants off in the cab and tried to bite his ear. Not going oout for awhile
We pulled over so he could pee and the next thing I know he's running down the hill by himself with his pants down
i drank out of a bidet.
DUDE EDDIE MURPHY JUST DID A BODY SHOT OFF A HOOKER. IM NEVER COMING HOME
I'm not wearing a bra, watching Netflix and eating gushers. I don't know a better way to spend a hangover.
I guess she fell asleep at the strip club and the other one was crying because she had a vagina in her face. Happy 21st!
Why do you have an empty bottle of port in your bathroom bin?
Dude a gay guy just Sparta kicked this Samoan guy for calling him a flamer you need to get down here the free kamakazee shots haven't even started yet
I was behind him snuggling, I told him I was the big spoon and he told me I was too little it was more like he was wearing a backpack.
There's that certain point at night when you start saying things like s'mores should be used in foreign relations. I reached it.
I went from looking for a bong to home decor in a 10 minute span. This is what being an adult is all about!
Now that you have a boyfriend, can I have my vibrator back?
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