sometimes i shoot so far i amaze even myself.
We were driving to yogurt express by state and these girls mooned is while they passed us and we saw full vag complete with tampon string dangling.
i'm at the st pattys day thing. the bar is packed. they just put on celine dion its all coming back to me now. i'm screaming the words.
it's 1 pm.
Of course, you get to fuck all night while I'm stuck in the girls bathroom sucking a limp dick for coke
You were offering to spell people's name for a dollar.
update: ifinallt managed t5o be in a. Horizontal position without throwing up... the snmall victories.
i dont know what was worse.. snorting the wasabi or puking on the neighbors dog
He referred to his penis as "a gentle giant" and said I had offended it
Bailey. He has a soul patch. Idgaf if he was an NFL player. Nobody with a soul patch is attractive.
I definitely think you should enjoy one last spring break being a sorostitute before you get serious and settle down with price charming. I mean hes not going to be there any way. he can wait a week.
I know I don't have feelings for him because I feel completely ashamed every time after we have sex
Side note: I just realized that I can make my hand warmers double as a heated push up bra.
True friendship: When you can hold your best friend's hair and still eat your Stromboli at the same time.
My potted cactus died. I am literally less nurturing than the desert.
In other news there's 12 shirtless Korean dudes all trying to jump on a tiny little trampoline so that's entertaining
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