gavin joseph was born around 1 oclock 9lbs 12oz... over 21 inches long
Thats what she said
I got drunk at the beach today. I got the word Badass! tatooed all the way across my foot. Probably a bad idea.
hey in girl talk does "want to come over tonight and have some beers with me?" mean i want wiener?
look. either you want to have late night naked sleep overs or you don't. do not involve dinner and extraneous conversations in this relationship.
He is juggling broken glass botttles, I think its time to cut him off...
nope, if she's going to skank it up with ginge-a-saurus douche she deserves the silent treatment.
bad night - i tried for naughty librarian but could only manage to pull off pissed off barrista.
Dad and I are shitfaced screaming at Canadians in Walmart. Life is good.
I quit life. I got pulled over on my way to work and they towed my car and dropped me off at work in a cop car
I just googled "creative ways to tell someone you'll give them a blow job". I'm losing my touch.
I was "singing along to the Lego Movie" high. Everything was not awesome
Slept with the roommate last night and also discovered that she believes in eugenics. I may need to slow down my drinking
I'm classy like audry Hepburn. Chugging wine out of the bottle on the way to the club. Shed do that. I know she would.
This whole brainwashing thing is easy!
I woke up and there was a tiny sombrero on my penis. Care to explain?
Randomize
