Dear tim. Christina farted and it smells like kid roses.
The bender is in full force. After 2 bloody mary's at breakfast we are now drinking vodka redbull "as a precaution" so we will stay awake for the club tonight.
Dude pussy is like music. For every person who pays for it, there are thousands more getting it for free.
He played a tape of his mad rapping skills after the final...his rapper name was Mad Stylz and he rapped about all the pussy he got in the 90's. I love Sociology.
some guy just burried his vomit in the sand.
I have reverted to folding laundry while watching porn. how much sadder can my life get?
Random Survey Question: If things start getting serious with this cop, do I have to stop doing coke?
Life Lesson #1 of 2013: double-fisting shower beers and shaving my bikini line should be reserved for two different showers.
Its okay that he doesn't remember you, he only remembers girls by their boobs and I think you were wearing a jacket
You threw a shot glass at the bartender and still managed to convince him to let us drink more. You are my hero.
Just walked into the library with a case of Strawberitas in hand.. no one said a word.. I think they were just impressed I knew where the library was
Tequila ran out around 11 so she let them do body shots of chips and guacamole instead
Eh. Fuck him. He's missing out. I'm legit naked and drinking straight from the bottle of wine.
In other news, Justin Bieber has a big dick and that makes me uncomfortable.
Gov of Georgia is going to allow massage therapists to return to work.
Gives a new meaning to 'Happy Endings'.
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