i think you broke pat's ankle when you drove over it... he's freaking out but on a more serious note i'm 99% sure i saw a werewolf
Hey on the reals though tomorrow if i take you out to lunch as just a friend will you also suck my cock as just a friend?
I just saw a girl on crutches doing a walk of shame. She is either super dedicated, or her night didn't go as planned.
If we worried less about pouring champagne down stripper crack, we probably wouldn't skip so many meals.
The cops just showed up and arrested her. It's our 2nd date. Do I have to hang out her with her 3 kids until she makes bail or can I leave?
the cashier ate half of our fries before she gave them to us so i think it's safe to say they don't do drug testing there
how many people can say they bit their tattoo off?
Maybe next year when I'm 30 I will be over puking at lunch on Fridays. Maybe
I was fed cake in bed and then was pinned down and ridden till I came. And then fed more cake. I'm going to marry Brad. I'll put money on it.
NO HE PUT HIS HAND IN HIS PANTS BEFORE HE TOUCHED THE BONG.
ILLEGAL
I will take a ruler to your dick so help me god
My professor congratulated me on turning my assignment in early. I didn't have the heart to tell him I only passed it in early cause my sex plans got canceled for the night.
i am risking my non lesbian vagina for your needs. i better be the best friend you ever had
On a scale of one to 10 how Risky is it to sleep with a married man (all morals set aside)
So... my daughter's new girlfriend Is the daughter of the girl I dated on and off in college Who ran away because she got pregnant at my house party. My Legitimate daughter Is probably fucking my Illegitimate daughter...
Randomize
