he told us the story of how he fought ketchup, mustard, and thomas the train engine all in one night. if that doesn't sound like an acid trip i dont know what does.
fyi, we didn't break up, we just downgraded to occasional sex without ever talking about it.
Living well is not the best revenge. Fucking his brother is.
it's fine if we fail the bar, we were never going to satisfy the moral character requirement anyway
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Don't worry. This time I'll get black out drunk so they'll just think it's an American thing.
I'm on my "fiiiiirrrst" glass of wine- the quotes mean it's the last of the bottle- so I really need you to pick up your phone so we can talk about this
Just rescued a super cute pair of Gucci heels off the sorority lawn on my way to work. Things are worth two paychecks. Fuck trust fund kids.
She lost her glasses and we found them on the roof. Don't ask questions. Kings cup was intense last night.
Your actions as of last night have earned you over thirty new nicknames.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Don't remember anything. Melissa just said I kept saying welcome to the bat cave
He is a real estate investor who’s face I’m going to sit on.
How much have you had to drink?
Qhaghao Oslo?
That seems like quite a lot.
Man, I miss taking bong rips in my room. Now they are bringing dogs around so all my stuff is hidden in random places up in the woods. I literaly have to hunt and gather just to get high.
Jack and I got in a huge fight at 6am. He fell asleep when I was giving him head so I freaked. We were both black out so I made a memo in my phone reminding me
really enjoying the fact I don't remember how the staff party ended. feel like I need to shame drink today
feel at noon?
Randomize