You're pretty and everything..but you aren't worth the DUI
you're just mad because in the hogwarts world I'm Harry and you're Ron. get over it.
Wow, So this kid just walked into class, yak'd on his lab partner then runs out. Class is now cancelled. I gotta find this kid and Thank him.
We just passed a billboard that said to join "jerseydoesntstink.com" and literally 15 seconds later, we could smell jersey.
I obviously couldn't but this on your fbook wall. I would get judge. I would willingly get tbagged by him. You can quote me on that.
I miss my brother. He would have fucked the fat girl for me.
I told you I would
I wouldnt do that to you. You're my actual friend
As if right now I am a humanitarian. Full story to come in the morning. It involves sex.
Why Weren't you wearing pants?
because pants are for people with no imagination
I fucking, woke up on a couch with a towel as a blanket to someones lion king ringtone.
But how will the next generation learn about life choices without a Jersery Shore?
Welp, I just herniated a vocal cord during sex. How was your night?
"I wonder if vinegar is some sort of magical hangover cure" "...no I was definitely still drunk and drinking vinegar because I was thirsty"
You told us that you were going to become a 'new man' and threw your tv set out of a window.
Pretty sure my first birthday present will be a pic of an 18-year-old's cock. And I am OK with that
Of course he did! You’ve seen my tits, you know he didn’t stand a chance!
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