Kroger has a sale on economy packs of some ridic brand of condom with a smiley devil heart on it $4.99 for 24
Sounds like a baby waitign to happen
just woke up. wallet empty. bottle empty. tattoo in pen on my arm. smell like bad sex. woke up alone. and wall-e is playing on my computer. need answers.
the only difference between me and a prostitute was that i complained a lot more.
No, I'm only going to drink half my paycheck. That's the responsible thing to do.
You know... If I put the same amount of effort into school as I put into giving women orgasms I would be a Rhodes scholar
Instead of centeral air we are getting a margaritaville machine. Thought you would enjoy our logic
His morals are debatable, but his heart or perhaps his penis is in the right place.
His penis is crooked. Right place? Maybe he starts there, but then he slants.
I slept with an Israeli and a Palestinian in the same day. It feels wrong.
you owe me at least a beer for the services my girlfriend just provided for you
fyi, pepper spray hurts. whoever comes up with the best backstory wins a prize.
so in case you needed a ticket for the Hot Mess Express, I'm the conductor now.
So, i might have left my morals back in 2011.
Stranded. In bathroom stall. No toilet paper. I repeat NO TOILET PAPER! Assistance needed asap. GO! GO! GO!
So how do I tell him I've been sleeping with his wife too?
OMG OMG OMG!!!! I made his penis bleed!! I repeat I MADE HIS PENIS BLEED!!!!
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