Applied 4 a nanny job usin a Legit Site. Xplain to me how the couple I found offered me a 3some complete with 'sexy pics' of the wife blowin hubby. wtf?
obviously you're part succubus.
Those strippers last night smelled great. It was the perfect mixture of vanilla and daddy issues.
the lady in the checkout infront of me had a case of beer, two 40 oz, and activia...really??i dont' think irregularity is her problem
Black Friday shoppers are ridiculous. I think I just watched a marriage end.
I'd be surprised if he had a problem with boundaries after helicoptering his penis in front of you
I just don't know what he sees in my vagina...and that scares me.
We tried to break her futon, I crushed my balls instead. You have one less reason to be jealous that my balls are insanely huge and yours are not.
your cat followed me a mile away from your house. if it doesn't come back, i'm sorry, but I needed to get laid tonight.
I'm about to airblow my boyfriend. I'll three-way you.
we received free cupcakes at the first bar, and then I at the second bar i hooked up with a fat chick from Cincinnati on the patio.
you win some, you lose some.
....she made me stop for like 3 minutes so she could talk to her cat....
lets do drugs on my lunch break tomorrow
That moment during finals day when you either convince your teacher to let you out of the room or you shit you pants.
that is either the most profound and meaningful thing i've ever heard, or someone got high before noon again.
We were making out on the floor and his 13 year old beagle crawled in between us & just sat there...I got cockblocked by an ancient beagle named Bubba
Randomize