so the time management class we had to take for work seems to be working. I just beat off instead of waiting for gf to get home bc it fit my schedule better.
Of all the things I am low enough to do, how could you even doubt if that was one of them?
no. 1 rule of bromania: no females
I just bought the ATT family protection plan so that I could block all of my old bar hookups from booty calling me...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Let's just say trying to drink my weight in apple pie shots looked better in theory.
A cute girl just told me she forgot to take her birth control and winked... I've never been so conflicted about fleeing in terror
The salesman at the smoke shop just told me my hair is glorious...
I just figured out how I'm going to tie you to my bed. Hint: I may have to go to the auto parts store before you get here.
I'm just waiting til he drunkenly pisses in his new man's car the way he always whipped it out and went Bellagio in mine.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It just smells like spaghetti and despair.
They don't have a Valentines Day card for the married guy I'm sleeping with. It can't use the words, love, soulmate, you're the only one for me...and obviously it can't be anything related to spending the day together because that's not happening.
That's okay I'm failing college because I'm to busy giving over the pant handjobs in class..
I have a dinner date combo blowjob event with Tristan tonight.
She demanded to see my stimulus package, I had to go over.
Drinking at 10 in the morning and swimming might not be the best idea I've ever had but it beats working
Randomize