A squiggle pen was my first vibrator back when I was young. I would lock myself in my bedroom with that thing. Oh to be 8 again.
I am so horny I keep driving over the rumble strips... best half hour ever.
hey can i play with your boom stick tonite? I'll let you shoot the love of jesus in my face.
come over
The stories of what you did in Cuba got home before you.
not only did i soak my thesis by spilling celebratory shots on it, but i also stained it with lipstick making it obvious i tried to drink the vodka off it......dgaf, worth it.
Dude, I had to stop mid fuck. Her cat was swatting at my balls as I did her from behind. I couldve lost something.
I ate 12 cupcakes in less than 24 hours, so no judgement here.
We have a bucket list tonight. Not done yet. Gotta climb a building
He was twisted. Literally. It's like God took his dick with a pair of pliers and gave it a half twist to the left.
We have so much sex to catch up on
This isn't a because its valentines day booty call, it's a because your cock is phenomenal booty call that happens to be on valentines day..
Sexting across continents is really a perfect example of how far technology has come.
of fours songebofy did dknt stop believing
how legible are my texts
my extended weekend of being as irresponsible as possible started with blowing the bartender in the bar bathroom. off to a good start.
I moved to this city Tuesday and got laid Saturday. Still got it.
Randomize
