I gave up sex with dolphins for you.
hot girl, 5 o clock
do you know how to read a clock?
Just shaved my legs with toilet water in a walgreens bathroom. I am so classy.
i love that we sang a whole new world together while you carried me through campus
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Have $25 to my name but it's $2 pitchers. I have no choice but to go.
she peed on how many people?
If youre the one that ate my brownies this morning I only have two things to say to you
Those had pot in them
And good luck on your interview asshole
he said it was like fucking a big sack of slut potatoes
ps if your frozen peas taste like crotch it's because some dude kicked me in the nuts while trying to do a keg stand and I needed an ice pack
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
its sad im about to start saving up for how drunk i need to be for the holidays
I just had the stunning realization that I lost my virginity in a bunk bed.
I'm having leftover pizza for breakfast. I'm clearly not the greatest at this adult thing.
Just learned that the cute guy I've been flirting with at the beach this whole time is actually an inmate working in the community instead of being in prison.. My life is unreal
What is ur current declared sexuality for my bingo board
I'm sitting in the hospital with him while he's still half drunk with a busted leg because he thought he could do parkour off a rock
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