I could have mohawked her pubes.
ice luge is my downfall...
...u mean upfall.
I wish I was that guy from the miller light commercials so I could walk into parties and take peoples beer without getting yelled at
why are there post-it notes all around the apartment labeled where you guys had sex and in what position
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Remember when we did the egg drop from the Dyson building? Her vag is like that, except with a ham, and the ham doesn't make it. I'll be back to the apartment in ten.
I think "bars open christmas minneapolis" is the saddest google search i've ever done.
we ran out of wine so you tried to make some by throwing grapes and nail polish remover in a blender.
He's sobering up. It was really bad for like 45 minutes. He cried while telling me how he pictured us eating hotdogs on the beach together.
she chased the tour bus screaming I BET YOUR DICK IS THE SIZE OF YOUR MICROPHONE STAND. i think its safe to say were never getting vip passes again.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just want uncharted vagina. Fresh and ripe.
What are you doing and how can I add sex in there
the cops were hovering over him then shinned a flashlight to the floor above ours, then I realized that some fucker jumped from the third story.
fuck our hall.
i can't believe i'm giving you sex advice.
i've gotten sex advice under stranger situations. like while giving a blowjob behind the communications building.
Don't take a pillow from my bed. You don't know which ones of them my vagina has been on
I do have a moral compass! I can’t help it if it only points at penises
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