It was still light ouot when we were walking up Pier Ave and she kept asking if she could suck my nipples.
nothing cures the holiday blues like an open bar
Made a visit to my old puking stall. I missed it.
so I woke up without pants, but my cardigan was still on and fully buttoned. curious.
Why are there maracas in the dishwasher?
She passed out in the backyard, making "face down" snow angels ... so they could have a smile.
You were outside the bathroom the gay guy was puking in, screaming "IT GETS BETTER!" over and over again. Good message, poor execution.
You called me 32 times last night just to tell me you felt a heartbeat in your vagina?
I mean looking back on it, it's unlucky but at least now we can say we were in jail from 2011 to 2012
That's thinking positively..
Just for future reference, me asking if you're free, followed by a winking face is not my way of suggesting a tandem bike ride.
I played "in the air tonight" on a drum set made of titties, and I'm not even exaggerating
yeah I had to wear a fucking diaper from work home so I didn't get the shitty squirts all over my cars seats it was fucked
I decided to do drugs in front of her because if anyone can handle the truth it's a ghost
Right?? Give me some apple scented candles and I'm a fall wet dream
Alcohol. Making me feel good about myself since 2008
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