I think I kinda wanna bone that ginger from Harry Potter.
You literally just made my flesh crawl.
Dude it was awful. I woke up with more strippers in my dorm room than those duke lacrosse kids.
Dude, no matter how drunk you are, it's not okay to hug every other guy at a strip club. Mainly because boners are far too common.
Going to Kmart high is like jumping in a time machine back to the 80s
remember the good old days of high school when a half gal would last for more than a nite
He thanked me for being "his little blond pogo stick last night". Good thing?
We had sex in the ocean but the tide took our clothes away too. Its no fun walking back to the dorm wearing only a beach blanket between you.
remind me in the morning to get the random kid out of the closet and to clean the pudding off the wall
We've done the math and the dogs tails are wagging at a rate of 3000 wags per hour. Stoned.
Come over we're drinking with orange soda as a chaser to honor 90s nick kenan and kel.
Currently doing my walk of shame down a floating dock. No more guys who live on a boat EVER AGAIN
I apologize for being mean. I love the blender and your vagina.
You can laugh all you want but 99 grapes is a lot stronger than what you were drinking.
Speaking of lightening speed, he ate me out while I was watching The Flash. If that's not winning at life idk what is
Blacked out and showed everyone my nudes. They toasted to my nudes, and I got an outstanding ovation.
Randomize
