Gayer than 8 guys blowing 9 guys
wow, that really makes you stop and think.
Make note: the first date is too soon to make the "condoms are only for making balloon animals" joke.
I don't think he's ever woke up with a paraplegic stripper sitting on his face before.
and after you realized your puke was bright blue, you started crying hysterically and screaming, "I DON'T WANT TO BE A SMURF!" no more uv blue for you.
I want to apologize 3 days in advance for what's about to take place on St. Patrick's day.
I just ate a whole bag of celery instead of getting up to get a glass of water. That high.
Just googled "penis wearing a hat" i think it's safe to say nobody found my ex's lost phone...
I WILL NOURISH YOU WITH SOUP AND PENIS!!!!!! And a sandwich of your choosing.......you like turkey?
We smoked bowls and watched Cops for what seemed like hours. And yet I know I'll go back.
Saved a second guy who was crying/on the verge of wigging out. Just call me the drug whisperer.
Because sadly the idea of me having a girlfriend is crazy enough to be an April fools prank
I have never encountered a chode in the wild
As a gentleman whose genital hole is relatively small, you could imagine my reaction
How was the party
I came home with only one shoe, a t shirt tied around my shoeless foot and I was covered in motor oil. Oh and my shorts were inside out. So you tell me
I had to explain to the doctor why I'm peeing blood. He still didn't believe a girl would have that much sex... You could feel the judgement forming in the room when I went into the details...
Damn, well a girls gotta get laid too
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