so later when i'm crying over him remind me that he once called his penis "senor weeper"
She called it mighty mouse.. And from there it was down hill
my dad brought home flowers.. so i started talking to them
well, it ended with me crying outside the strip club saying i don't want to be 21 anymoree. i'd say it was a great 21st birthday.
i finally watched harry potter... a tad unrealistic if you ask me... i mean a ginger kid with 2 friends?
just had a very awkward conversation with the concierge at the hotel, they threw your underwear out
I'm sorry for gagging during our first time having sex
I was drunk
Please answer
Mixed review. I fucked her in the river, but then we were assaulted by ducks.
He sent me a recycled dick pic! He could at least use one without sunlight in it, considering it's 10pm
Dude, don't put me in a suit and feed me liquor; I'll never go home.
I gave up great shower sex to be here so don't say I never did anything for our friendship.
He was like the most intimidating looking guy you've seen in your life except he was really shittily doing the two step
That car ride home was pretty awkward. Your feeling up the girlfriend to the guy who's throwing up out the window. Thanks for that.
roommates are droppin acid, i really should stop them from staring directly at the light bulb, but their giggles are so enchanting.
I expected my Sunday morning walk of shame dressed as a sexy Dorothy would get some scorn, but nobody seems to even care
That’s because it’s 2020. The slutty costume walk of shame is a refreshing reminder of a time when wearing masks and catching communicable diseases was a right of passage, not everyday for the foreseeable future.
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