Think the blond can even spell "shiksa"?
How the fuck did you go into work today? You are a better man than I. I couldn't even show up to being unemployed on time.
Seeing Harry Potter 3D stoned: Pro- giant redheads w/cute accents. Con-weeping for stoners who only had Pink Floyd laser shows.
i wanna anger bang this girl behind me at work. she never shuts up with her annoying voice. but her boobs are phenom.
Just heard this lady walk by on her phone saying "did everyone orgasm?"
as my niece was drinking milk out of a crown royal glass i realized i dont think i've ever bought a glass that didnt come with a bottle of liquor....
I saved him as teletubby in my phone....that can't be a good sign. I'm not answering.
My booty call just put me down for a reference for her job at the hospital. What am I supposed to say? She gives great bj's?
Right now he's sitting in the chair pointing to me to go away. He's trying to have quiet time with his penis.
If his smile makes you freak out and drop things imagine what his penis could do
Balls deep in an Orange is the New Black marathon. Bring food and drugs.
My soul is telling me that I need to take this exam naked.
Yesterday we were fuck buddies and today I'm meeting his mom. That escalated quickly.
I've just had my first cup of coffee in a month and I moaned at the first drink and honestly I think this is the most sexual expreiance in 6 months
Is it something I'm going to want to hug you for or slap you for?
Randomize
