Ummmm the art teacher neighbor asked me to pose nude for her art class for cash.
pretty sure i remember announcing that i lost my virginity to that brad paisley song when it came on during power hour?
I knew you were drunk when you poured scotch on a croissant and ate it.
protesters in toronto definately have the best pot
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
my brother walked in while we were fucking, silently took my bong from my closet, saluted us and walked out.
Uh, do you remember who's thong is in my tree?
My only regret this past weekend is abusing only 3 substances when I could have done so much more.
I was chasing pulls of fireball with bites of a bagel and yelling at people to take tequila shots with me. I shouldn't be allowed to go out alone.
My mom just drunk texted me complaining about her genitals smelling like Taco Bell. I really am her son
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
His dick is magical but I don't want to die in this blizzard do you see my dilemma
COCAINE IS GR8
I can't. I'm going camping this weekend. I do have a life outside of your dick.
She puked in the bed, peed in the closet, and woke up on a Rubbermaid in the closet under the stair case
i had to flash a cab last night.
did it work?
No. he slowed down but then kept going. story of my life.
I found a tomato seed inside my jeans. I did not eat tomatoes
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