I wanna blow your doors off so bad right now.
Doors?
Rock your world. Blow you out. Skeet skeet.
I really wish i had a penis so i could dick slap that bitch right now
do you think the kids from 7th heaven are mad that dennis and sweet dee are their half-brother and sister?
you gave the police officer your chanel wallet and said 'just keep it the i.d. is fake too'.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
That fucking fat Asian kid that NOBODY invited is stuck in the dryer again
hey did i steal that bike before or after the ball dropped, casue i might have broken my resolution already
its time for step 4 of getting over him: post his number on the transvestite page on craigs list asking for pics
Yes, he made a MIX CD for our booty call...
Who the fuck was that guy he kept pulling his dick out walking up to people trying to hand it to people and saying go ahead open the door like it was a door knob
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He's both a cowboy and a firefighter. Saying "no" was not an option.
I'm going to crush up my last 7 Percocets into a fine powder and toss my popcorn in it.
What do I do when my mom and I both awkwardly spot the Rocky Horror parody porn sitting on the coffee table? Leave it or try to move it?
I tried to open a bottle of wine with toenail clippers last night. So this morning was obviously rough.
He went down on me for an hour and a half. He needs to get promoted more often.
plus like he's kinda a piece of shit. a beautiful somewhat talented piece of shit that hella needs to get his life together
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