yeah i was sneaking up to her room and on the way i saw a picture of her and left
Come home. Power Hour by yourself is only fun for the first 10 minutes.
I wish scraping a resin bowl could be considered cleaning.
I know I said I wouldn't, but he told me I looked like Mila Kunis. Reasons not to fuck him, go.
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Tell me you didn't have sex with my dad.
If you really wanted to hide the fact you were gay, you could have at least had the sense to not get drunk in the same bar as your bf.
How do I feel about a girl who has a g string tattooed on
Apparently being drunk on a southwest flight and yelling "TURNUP" during take off is looked down upon in this state.
I was told I sang Taylor Swift's entire discography in between violent bursts of green vomit before falling asleep in the bath tub
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dude you literally had like 30 screwdrivers, i thought you were gonna die
that explains why my vomit smells like it came from florida
You were drink-wine-from-the-bottle drunk trying to take everybody's blood pressures again.
Everything was going well until he very loudly said that he wanted to cum on my fingernails.
I walked into the bathroom and there's this 6'5" cop washing his hands. He looks at me and goes, "Heard you singing outside. Sound real pretty."
No more tequila EVER.
we had sex in his office so i figured it was appropriate to like his company's page on facebook
I'm sorry I couldn't bail you out, apparenty they dont take credit cards over the phone. Did you at least make any friends in jail?