Texts From Last Night

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  (407): View more from Florida

  The Worst (noun)- 1. Getting up at 6am after a night of drinking. 2. Wearing a Peter Rabbit costume.

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  (407): The Worst (noun)- 1. Getting up at 6am after a night of drinking. 2. Wearing a Peter Rabbit costume. http://tfl.nu/7n2b
  Replies (5) Good night (1025) Bad night (1457)
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  (208): View more from Idaho

  the sex was like sticking it in a jar of mayonnaise

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  (208): the sex was like sticking it in a jar of mayonnaise http://tfl.nu/n0e5
  Replies (59) Good night (897) Bad night (8633)
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  (847): View more from Illinois

  Why did you take off so early

  (224): View more from Illinois

  No more beer. And also. Threesome. Maybe. Ill let you know.

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  (847): Why did you take off so early (224): No more beer. And also. Threesome. Maybe. Ill let you know. http://tfl.nu/xucj
  Replies (7) Good night (4661) Bad night (572)
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  (415): View more from California

  Yeudjkisdjxbfceryuj. i love having a qwerty keyboard just so i can do that.

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  (415): Yeudjkisdjxbfceryuj. i love having a qwerty keyboard just so i can do that. http://tfl.nu/ab18
  Replies (30) Good night (3880) Bad night (921)
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  (720): View more from Colorado

  It makes me feel uncomfortable and unsafe when he licks my pants

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  (720): It makes me feel uncomfortable and unsafe when he licks my pants http://tfl.nu/j8mk
  Replies (8) Good night (1081) Bad night (5348)
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  (386): View more from Florida

  smelt my brothers hands when he got home to see if he lied about smoking again...he didn't lie but i definitely didn't expect to smell some other girls vagina.

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  (386): smelt my brothers hands when he got home to see if he lied about smoking again...he didn't lie but i definitely didn't expect to smell some other girls vagina. http://tfl.nu/3vsv
  Replies (79) Good night (2672) Bad night (8295)
• Favorite

  (908): View more from New Jersey

  While I was banging her, her cell rang. She checked to see who it was, answered it, and moaned, "I'm dumping you."

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  (908): While I was banging her, her cell rang. She checked to see who it was, answered it, and moaned, "I'm dumping you." http://tfl.nu/7a3m
  Replies (55) Good night (27366) Bad night (2704)
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  (303): View more from Colorado

  Everytime I walk into a bathroom at school that I've taken a pregnancy test in I get a little bit nostalgic....

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  (303): Everytime I walk into a bathroom at school that I've taken a pregnancy test in I get a little bit nostalgic.... http://tfl.nu/nllq
  Replies (6) Good night (950) Bad night (3483)
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  (317): View more from Indiana

  she's using the space heater to try to heat up a pop-tart...

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  (317): she's using the space heater to try to heat up a pop-tart... http://tfl.nu/ywxy
  Replies (8) Good night (2857) Bad night (914)
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  (423): View more from Tennessee

  The fact that its 530pm and I'm saying to myself I should sober up since I'm at a family establishment should say enough

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  (423): The fact that its 530pm and I'm saying to myself I should sober up since I'm at a family establishment should say enough http://tfl.nu/ewgw
  Replies (5) Good night (2506) Bad night (988)
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  (765): View more from Indiana

  It is 9pm, let the ass parade to the bars begin

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  (765): It is 9pm, let the ass parade to the bars begin http://tfl.nu/0j6s
  Replies (3) Good night (970) Bad night (505)
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  (309): View more from Illinois

  We sent off fireworks off in the taco bell drive through. They're taking it way too seriously.

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  (309): We sent off fireworks off in the taco bell drive through. They're taking it way too seriously. http://tfl.nu/aavt
  Replies (6) Good night (1274) Bad night (542)
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  (240): View more from Maryland

  Was it just me or did you also find it awkward when "glad you came" started playing on pandora right after you finished?

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  (240): Was it just me or did you also find it awkward when "glad you came" started playing on pandora right after you finished? http://tfl.nu/q6tp
  Replies (3) Good night (1303) Bad night (639)
• Favorite

  (564): View more from Washington

  I've never heard "I will drown your mother in vanilla pudding" as an insult before, and then last night happened.

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  (564): I've never heard "I will drown your mother in vanilla pudding" as an insult before, and then last night happened. http://tfl.nu/a3m1
  Replies (2) Good night (766) Bad night (399)
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  (880): View more from

  And at the semi-adult age of 25 I have shit my pants. Not even drunk, just really late to work. Is this real life?

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  (880): And at the semi-adult age of 25 I have shit my pants. Not even drunk, just really late to work. Is this real life? http://tfl.nu/xgp4
  Replies (1) Good night (165) Bad night (459)

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