Kenny Powers is just a normal guy with exceptional hair
What's everyones problem with my costume?!
It looks like a unicorn came on your face.
EVERY baby cries during their baptism. It's like they know from that moment on their parents are going to make them do lame things like their first communion and stuff.
i have it on good authority that she is not as good at giving head as she claims she is
think im gonna go get a six pack before class and sit in the back of the room...
He came on me while singing crank dat like soulja boy, fuck our sex life has reached a whole new level of low
So Ive been fucking her for the past couple months and i just found our that my grandfather and her grandmother were fuck buddies for a while. I feel like this is a new awesome family tradition that skips a generation.
Drunk sex destroyed my coffee table... ikea this weekend?
You're going to have to tell him your name isn't Ivor McTruckson eventually.
You'd be proud of me. They tried to give me bread to sober up, but I told them no, im on a diet.
In other news, I apparently ate my retainers while rolling last night.
No we don't really celebrate valentines day, we just use it as an excuse to drink 3 bottles of red wine and fuck for a few hours.
I feel like ditching all logic and responsibility and get shit-faced before the week's over. Thoughts?
I was so high I just stared at the papa john's app on my phone and cried
he said he only had one rule...that he'd only go down on me 3x a day. so far this is turning into the best relationship ever.
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