David Carradine died? Should I be thinking about this 10 min before my interview?
Haha just ref him when they ask a questin about kung fu which they will since ur Asian
i woke up to her playing with my penis. just wiggling it around and around. awkward night? i would say so.
i hope you realize that ur overconfidence only gave me one orgasm out of all the times we had sex. that's like a 1% success rate. u might wanna rethink how amazing you are.
no its okay don't call 911, she's alive. just stopped by her house and banged on her door. she said she turned her phone off because she "had to be alone with her shame and embarassment". typical.
I don't even have to turn the heat on in my car. Just fart the whole way home.
You realize it's finals week?
Ya that's the school's fault. St. Patrick's day came first.
i'm using salt from the free peanuts to stop the bleeding.
gpnpr hd vmdd nm the ggrl whm was mn my lar
I need you to use more vowels.
you're like that jamaican tarat card reading chick... only with herpes
I walked in and all four of you were covering your heads under the blanket singing waterslides in unison.
Walking into the first day of college is like walking into a meat market. A meat market of sex.
I found a half-finished mass text from my California weekend that said "things I want to rape: you, things, stuff, and le"
It's the best! If I had one wish it would be for life to be one really long gay porno. Thats what I wish for during every 11:11.
Just ignore the penis. It's won't bother you. I promise.
It was pretty awesome. I drank out of a stein and attempted to dance to dubstep with some older guys in leiderhosen.
Randomize
