Brickbreaker makes my post drinking poops that much better. Sorry, I had to tell someone who might agree.
Is it a bad that I spent my 5 year anniversary with my husband texting my ex boyfriend?
explain to me why "crisis hotline lolz" is in my contacts?
We found him. 8 blocks away from the bars and almost at his parent's house. On the verge of tears.
I think I might stay on campus instead of going home for thanksgiving and see how many townies I can hook up with and no one will be around to judge
Just pooped at the strip club. NOT NORMAL . I may be a little too comfortable here.
He leaned in to kiss me and I dodged him but i fell on the floor. I guess I never got up cuz I woke up on the floor and he was in his bed
i looked at my phone & had a message that said "tell your friend she needs to clean my livingroom, i dont appreciate her trying to turn it into a bubblebath." I give you probs.
LEAVE MY LITTLE DICK OUT OF THIS
He came up behind me making dolphin noises in my ear when I noticed a collection of hors d'ouevres from the reception earlier in his jacket pocket
I will never doubt you again...he IS perfect for you
I left for five minutes and Chris wound up half in women's clothes, half naked. And the naked half was covered in shamrock stickers.
He is currently in a meeting and I am sexting him in Italian
And he's using Google translate to reply. Who says cross country relationships can't be fun?
I'm terrified that I'm going to have a baby with a guy who posts snapchat stories while ignoring my texts
just call my name and ill be there, if we are puking, beating up bitches, or pickin up men, OR avoiding wierd men, so many situations require a wingman
Is 6 weeks really a benchmark now?
Ask me in 6 more weeks, when they're in a bisexual polycule.
Randomize