Hi
Babe...You're really smothering me right now
if reincarnation is for serious, i better be a guy in my next life
with a huge shlong
massive. i wanna make bitches cry
Well, find something you can use as a snorkel and be aware of your surroundings.
I sorta feel bad for the actual person in my fake id that got a drunk in public charge.
Cancel that soberness update. I just almost fell down in the security line
the most romantic thing he could do for me right now would be to throw himself into traffic
I greatly enjoy being related to her. Even if is it only by a penis.
Bringing families together since 1987
He keeps bees of course he's weird
and then you called me a third time and yelled that you were stealing a puppy named Willow
She has a bong hits for Jesus shirt. Of course I'm going to like her.
Hey, you should go to your facebook ASAP... i'm guessing you're wasted but you just uploaded a picture of someones dick...and everyones taking bets now if its Rick or Mikes..
he made that chewbacca noise when he came. like father like son i guess.
Still can’t get over the fact that we ate beef jerky off a strip club floor
Get here now. There’s a guy dressed as Captain Morgan handing out miniature bottles of Captain Morgan.
Dude this weed has me so paranoid.
Yeah tell me about it I just screamed after I coughed because my own cough scared me.
Randomize
