last night i used 411 to try and contact britney spears.
dollar well spent
this girl and her friend just showed up at my house. standing together, theylook exactly like the number 10. this has cockblock written alllllll over it.
is 1am too late, or too early to make bacon?
Today's face brought to you by last night's make-up.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
On the bright side I still get a $20 referral bonus at the plasma center even though he passed out during donation because he was so high.
She scratched my sunburn during sex. I didn't know whether to cry or cum
He just showed up to brunch with one shoe and only the battery from his phone.
I have nothing to lose. And a bunch of dick to gain.
pretty sure tht was the guy who once went to the club dressed as waldo. he still looks weirdly fuckable.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We need to make boob twerking a thing. I feel like that's why vine was invented
Do the right thing and go fuck yourself off a cliff
At first it will make you think "how is this physically possible?" and then it will ruin an entire food group for you.
Just once, I'd like to make it to my first wedding anniversary for a change.
Drug test isn't today. Now I'm just sitting in this orientation with a bag of your piss in my pants
She totals her lexus and all she wants is to have crazy wild sex.
Randomize