Is it bad to mix sunny d with vodka if i dont have any real OJ?
I've mixd ketchup with vodka before and called it a bloody mary, so, no.
very cute, but more "I wanna put you in my pocket and keep you as a pet" and less "please bang me" type of cute.
So are you the girl that gave me herpes? or was that the girl from the night before
all you kept yelling was "i'm bored and i'm sober"
just joined the mile high club. if this plane crashes because of this text, it was worth.
you can feel better about your life now. i slept with a guy who has gold teeth
he picked an earring up off the bar floor and tried to give it to girls as a present.
Dave a horae rider a coqw boy
He tried to use a signal flare to light the bong
And?
He melted the stem
I'm just glad you're the only person I can have a "remember when we thought I was pregnant" conversation with.
All right cuz right now I'm in one of those moods where the shear thought of doing anything more strenuous than making a sandwich has me wanting to curl up in the feeble position and splash around in a puddle of my own tears.
Do I need to take a photo of my sister's enlarged and disgustingly dark nipples to scare you into protection? DO I?
I hope one day I make out with someone in a taco truck :(
I'm glad I inspire you to reach for the stars
Or a taco
Looking back on this weekend, I'm most grateful I never brought up with word "toe-fucking" at the bachelorette party.
She flirted with a pilot and a frat boy at the airport in Vegas and told our bartender his mask matched her panties so yeah I’d say she’s rebounding from the divorce
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