my vagina is like the nba. its where amazing happens.
worse. her friends hid in the bathroom while she gave me head and then screamed surprise right as i was about to cum
that's the nicest way anyone's ever asked me to send them naked pics before...
Tequila is the liquid version of celery. I lose more calories during tequila drunk and the following sexual activities than I gain by drinking it...
He is like a dragon that makes me want to spread my butt cheeks, so he can fill me with hot fire.
She's comparing the feel of breasts to shredded cabbage. Weirdest. Grandmother. Ever.
My dad just accidentally taught me how to make fake IDs. I love my life.
WHAT IS HAPPENING
A FLOCK OF DICKS IS MIGRATING TOWARDS US.
In the last six hours i have procured a free sandwich, watched three movies, and came to orgasm. If that isn't productivity then i don't know what is.
Simple revenge plan: break into his house and steal one shoe of every pair
Sex in a hot air balloon, top that one!
Is it day drinking when the suns up like when does that start
asking for a friend
we f'd six times
f'd?
its sunday, i cant say fucked
Is it weird that my mother is taking body shots off my gf after meeting once?
Omg I just looked in my purse from last night.. 10 bags of gummy bears.
Randomize
