Conclusion from last night: Sometimes being classy isn't as fun as making out with a guy on a pooltable in a bar. Happy birthday, Canada.
Tonight must have been good, I have already had two cups of coffee but still couldn't figure out how to operate a door.
We tried having a conversation with our noses.
omg my older sister has been googling "how do I know if I've had an orgasm?" and "bj tips". the family laptop is not meant for this...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Well if my looks don't work with her I'll eat the 50 nuggets to impress her fat roommate.
So should I finish watching Space Jam and then get head? Or get head while secretly watching Space Jam?
we're like Indians of the 21st century. trading not for food and survival but personal gain and by trouble you mean getting daytime drunk and going to the roller ring then yes.
Passed out on the bench in the men's bathroom. Feel much better now.
This is America. Deny every slut accusation or own up to it
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
my memory may be fuzzy, but the 20+ naked pictures I sent him were surprising clear
I just connected with one of your drug dealers on LinkedIn.
Actually, I may scrap this entire plan. I just realized that I had sex with a guy with his own whiskey commercial.
Sooo I ended up ugly crying at the drive thru window at 10 pm last night....how was your valentine's day?
Well what did you order
How was the party
I came home with only one shoe, a t shirt tied around my shoeless foot and I was covered in motor oil. Oh and my shorts were inside out. So you tell me
That’s all I need in life: vibrators, butt plugs, strawberry lube, and sour gummies
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