so the car was packed with everything from my dorm, plus my mom. during the 6 hour trip home she found my kama sutra. started flippin through it.....
oh shit that had to have been awkward
i thought so too. until she asked what the check marks were for
I heard Topanga got a DUI. I need that mugshot asap.
The is a pregnant woman in this Chipolte wearing a shirt that simply says ‘OOPS!’ across the tummy.
That baby is bound to be under-loved.
Her boobs looked like leather oven mitts. No more cougar hunting for awhile.
On a side note, I now know what a $150 cab ride looks like
youre not allowed to be friends with girls ive double teamed. period.
what is it with giant penises always finding me
You're right. Single life welcomed me back with open arms. It's like it knew it wasnt going to be long when I left.
How could I forget your birthday? I have an alarm in my phone to ask you for sex that day.
I am the kind of drunk to where i can still drive a golf cart
I feel like we should build an island for girls that have committed atrocious numbers of unforgivable sins. We'll call it 'whore island' after the anchorman fashion.
Thats alot of pressure.
Just on your vagina. BTW I'm passing your house.
I mean, that's eating your cake and fucking it too.
He's only done it missionary. His world is about to be rocked. Do you know what I look like from behind?
dude, i just found out morgan freeman loves weed. all my moms arguments are now irrelevant
Randomize
