I woke up this morning under my fitted sheet and my legs through the sleeves of my sweater.
So does your leg always twitch violently when someone plays with your clitoris? Or has my ten years of piano playing finally paid off?
so he let me use one of the toothbrushes that came in his daughters 4 pack, purple glittery toddler toothbrush, the next time i came back his wife has used their label maker and put my name on it...
I had never watched a guy jack off to me before, but let me tell you, it was a very uncomfortable experience.
i leave for school in 3 days. if you want your annual goodbye blow job you should probably call me
I really hope our interview with channel 6 last night doesn't air or else my parents are gona get a first hand look at my alcohol problem
Wednesdays are like the thursdays of tuesdays... Drink time
I can always tell its time to do laundry when my vibrator doesn't stay covered up in my sock drawer.
Is there a technical name for reverse cowgirl? I'm trying to maintain a little dignity with my mother here
I have bruises all over from falling so much last night, I even have bruises on my arms from them picking me up off the street.. Oh vodka nights.
The day i have a fb album titled " I have become a townie" you can shoot me in the foot and tell me to get my life together
whatever bro. i had ice cream and whiskey for breakfast and its noon. this is the second worst christmas ever.
Just threw up mid-poop. I can't drink like I used to.
Bro. I traded my coat. I have a Raiders coat now.
ARE YOU DEAD? TEXT Y FOR YES OR N FOR NO.
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