my mom just told me how she used to love having sex while stoned. wtf.
I hope the kids appreciate the fact that I jizzed on her instead of on their slide.
After the sixth shot I started to slur my pauses.
she said if I bought her franzia she would blow me, and she would fuck me if I splurged on martini and rossi. Franzia it is
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i did make 45 jello shots and that makes me feel more productive then any paper would
while cleaning my room, i've found many wonderful things. one of these is the card you gave me for my eighteenth birthday. it's a christmas card that says "i want to stick it in your sponger"
All I could understand from his text was "hatchet" "soccer" & "bitch". its safe to say andy has had enough to drink & will be violent soon
It's official. This guy and I are going gay for each other. We're tasting the fucking rainbow.
Girl it's 3:30 get your life together and come enjoy a bowl, some coffee and a brownie with me
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I sat on my couch last night watching What Women Want, eating ice cream, and sobbing "why doesn't she like me?" Why was I born a man?
I am on my usual post-jerkoff high of eternal happiness. Like I could punch a fucking tiger.
nothing out of the ordinary. you aplogized for having a spicy vagina and passed out
Well statistically J has a 1 in 3 chance of hospitalization when downtown
And a 3 for 3 for disapeearing
Please explain the hospital band on my wrist.
I threw up soo much that I started crying. Then his grandma randomly came in and started rubbing my back...
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