I want to bang chis in dee ass burt he be hating on me times two. Me be tryin ti love onu
Bendover
I swear if I see one more guy in a v-neck and fedora I'm going to punch someone in the balls. This is philly, you're not supposed to look like Ryan Cabrera
I want to do you till i cant cum anymore. Till all i get is a little flag that says "bang".
I can't finish this paper in my room because every time I get distracted I start masterbating. I think it's time to go to the library...
Is being a pregnant whore worse than an average one?
We had sex and then he fed me pie. This is the best friends-with-benefits situation ever.
Important info for allergy season. An orgasm will unblock stuffy sinuses.
I woke up in bed alone w 2 bite marks on my boob... Salt and pepper shakers In my purse along w a bottle of steak sauce.... The drunkasauraus has struck again
I asked him if we could hang out sometime when we weren't hammered. He said he'd email me his number... that's when I knew I was going to die alone
He invites me over too FucK and i wind up eating 6 jimboys tacos with his roommates. While he waited in his room. Maybe next time
So right before she was about to give me head she tapped the tip and said "Is this thing on" I think I'm in love.
I'm going to stop at grocery on the way home. I'm CRAVING wine from a sippy cup. We have neither wine nor sippy cups.
Dude we need to hang out soon. I'm in the mood to get arrested again.
the last thing is remember is that strange guy in the leotard...i woke up in my bed, naked, with a half eaten grilled cheese on my nightstand, a six pack in the fridge, a new pack of cigarettes on my pillow and coke in my purse. apparently i bought some drugs, shopped and cooked. typical.
I am way to hungover for it to be Thursday.
Randomize