Things overheard in WeHo: "Just drink a corona and eat some ass, you won't be hungry anymore"
You know that bakery that Sandra Bullock's sister owns?
The one in Montpelier?
yeah, well it doesn't exist anymore. VT's one fucking claim to fame closed.
she is graduated, working for the school, and puking in the bathroom of a frat house. she wants brush her hair so she doesnt "look trashy". im in love.
made out with three guys on the first night of college orientation, just imagine what joys all of next year will hold
Sorry I had passed out by this time I think, with the chicken fingers ON my face in my bed, with all the lights on, and ketchup all over.
...She then said get into the spirit and started making firecracker noises while having sex
My overnight senior got drunk and hooked up with Kaylee on Sunday. I checked Facebook and he already put down his deposit for next year. This school should pay me a commission.
if I was any more soft right now, my penis would be a liquid
I put you to bed and you would not go unless I let you sleep with the vodka
I'm sitting outside your room listening for sex noises eating pepperoni...slowly
This gem of a conversation has been brought to you be weed
I woke up with my name tag for work still on my shirt. It was a rough night.
Wow! It's so great to hear from you! We all thought you perished in Winepocalypse 2012, man.
Just had a smooth transition from sexting to buffalo chicken dip 😂😂😂
Your skills amaze me
Just walked out of the train bathroom after having sex and got a round of applause from the passengers. Definitely the best part of the trip.
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