She told me a very interesting story, complete with pantomimes, about how she got a habanero seed in her vag
It's official. Every guy I've slept with has been to jail.
If my bosses could see, smell or hear me right now they would understand why its a horrible idea to keep the office open sundays
i dont know everytime i see her teeth i get erectile disfunction
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I wouldnt consider it a good Wednesday if there wasn't any projectile vomit involved
The cardboard box in my backseat wasn't strong enough to keep your pee contained. Come clean my car.
I am fine. Katie thinkr i broke things pole dancing. I am coherant.
she gave me one of those friendship bracelets and said as long as I wore it it was like an all-access pass to her vagina
We got a 5L jug of wine for 3 Euro. Italy was a good choice.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I remember trying to cut the power to a house I thought was "too bright to understand the meaning of christmas". Pretty sure I blacked out down the street.
They sat me on college avenue with a puke bucket and people were mistakenly throwing change in it. Got me enough money take a cab back to my apartment.
I asked him why I was having sex with him in the middle of having sex. It was sufficiently awkward.
? I'm just sitting watching something borrowed alone, crying in my boxers , feel like I should probably do something
I heard Enya coming from steve’s room. I am too high to handle this sudden depth of character
He goes "what would you say if I told you I like to get it in?" def a potential soulmate right there.
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