I prefer the term 'tenderly watching'
such a stalker...
she wanted to love me. she just didn't know it yet.
I just got back to Nicks and I shoul dnot have drank this much when I have to work at 7AM!!!!!
please come you make the beer taste better
20 yrs from now I just want to barge in her house and yell at her kids, "I took ur moms virginity!"
We're doing the donut challenge later. How many can we fit on his erect penis. Needless to say we get along well.
woke up this morning in the hall outside of my parents room with a sign taped to myself that said "im sorry"...
Then he complimented me on how excellent I was at breathing through my nose
We found you in the middle of the road chucking gravel because "the house was too far away".
She cracked her neck before the blowjob and I knew shit just got real.
you just rode your bike home from a one night stand in a stolen skirt with no underwear and you're telling ME to reevaluate life choices?!
He's slurring his text. I didn't think that was possible.
The medical term is prolapsed anal walls if you want to look into it with dignity.
I felt like a slutty ass cruella devil driving your old car, And I got in a fight with your wipers
I'm like a great zombie Jesus.
It'd be good to change things up a bit, right now the only public service I'm doing from my apt is hanging out in my underwear with the lights on.
Randomize
