How many pudding cups do I have to eat for it to count as dinner?
4.
I don't know where I am, but its a Goosebumps novel waiting to happen.
UD be completely fine. you don't lose control just keep a positive environment. for example i really want to lick the wall cause red is delicious but i don't have to.
Studying for the exam.. Identifying the portraits using phrases like "large penis"
I have shoes on. No pants. And my jacket pockets are full of ketchup and grass. Yes. Good night.
If I remember who won the superbowl tomorrow morning.. I think I'm just going to quit drinking. There really won't be a point anymore
Can we make a pact that if we're 40 and still sluts that aren't married we can get civil unioned the fuck up and raise an asian baby as our own?
So I feel like I should feel objectified by your comment about my boobs but instead I just feel proud. 21ST CENTURY FEMINISM, BABY
We split an eighth of shrooms and went ice fishing. It didn't get weird until I caught one and we both started crying.
You are cordially invited to an I'm not pregnant laser tag celebration tomorrow. booze is optional.
I'm twenty nine years old, now is not the time to start trying new drugs. I need a hedge fund...not another drug-induced hangover.
Ick. That's not even the fun kind of punishment.
If you can't trust the person at the taco cabana drive thru, who can you trust?!
so I just realized.. of my 70k student loan debt, most of it went toward bar tabs, eightballs, and sweet-ass ties to wear to gamedays and other people's weddings. I think about shit like this while I'm at my mid-level management position. you know. "working."
Look upon your future, America, and despair.
So my dad just asked, "did you leave without pants a lil bit ago?"
Randomize
