did you know that the clit is basically just a tiny penis? Ya.. So just think about that next time you're down there.
so i definitely just saw 2 cops high five each other as they were arresting underage drinkers in 5 points.
Best feeling in the world? holding your pee all day for a negative preggo test
The great thing about skinny blondes is that they're all interchangeable.
i remember you telling me to take a shower, brush my teeth, go get back in bed w her, and "just do what i was born to do." and as soon as i stopped yacking i did just that. you saved my birthday.
Would it be weird if I told you I thought of you when I masturbated?
Looks like I'm more than just your Mexico mistake...
My vagina and my morals are playing tug of war
Watching the wiggles while tripping on acid is the scariest fucking thing of all time
It's like they're playing jeopardy and the category is "things that make women dry."
If I hid at school to avoid the cops, is it fleeing and evading or just being a good student?
I showed my cat the amount of coke I had. She looked concerned.
Hey. Im sorry to bother you but I just watched the seinfield episode about faking an orgasm and it caused me to second guess myself. Were you satisfied?
Is offering to blow your HR rep considered an ethics violation?
I need a pedicure
You need to go to planned parenthood
It's done, I'm done, goodbye veneer of class and dignity it was nice knowing you
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