You hurt me so bad and it feels so good
Nicole wore just a belt and her pedometer and hopped on top of me last night. She "walked" 822 steps before we finished.
New charity walk idea!
cheating on your boyfriend is the best diet ever, I've barely eaten in days. The guilt is killing me
on the list of things i learned today that are not stripper poles: ex-boyfriends, table legs, and police officers.
I'm on a no morals kick. That'll be 3 girls in 24 hours....ending 2011 with a bang
This is why I need to move out...so my naked vomit covered walk of shames to the bathroom are only witnessed by one other person who is equally as pathetic as me and the cat
We won't have time to talk.. I'll be rolling you a blunt and you'll be getting naked.
Please ask me to tell you about the time I watched two of my friends chase my drunk roommate with a broken foot around downtown
On the upside, no one went to the hospital! Lex's friend was definitely on fire at one point last night though because he tried to juggle tiki torches. He was shirtless this morning and smelled like a BBQ.
She said "I feel like I haven't reached my full potential" and I couldn't figure if she meant in life or with the weed..
I say this out of love and friendship. Eat ice cream not the d.
The lady that was sitting beside me thought the best way to cheer herself up was to pet and ruffle my hair while crying and telling me her problems...
No? The only contact I've had with him for months was when I drunk texted him from Costa Rica to say that all jazz sounds the same
He looks like a Mormon from a lifetime movie. Oddly I wanna give him a hand job
Would the comment "Down Goes Frasier" be too inappropriate at this time?
Randomize
