Confirm your location. A cross street is best, but if google mapping yourself is your least-shameful option go for it. ps- going through his mail for an actual address is always an option.
i just googled "alcohol delivery service". im combating drunk driving one lazy act a time.
I knew shit got real when the pinapple was gone and people were just passing around the core and gnawing on it.
I dont think yelling "Grab your dicks, time for pics!" helped your case either.
Dave a horae rider a coqw boy
Semen is not good for contacts.
He said in a slur "I go so hard, even when I..." and cut himself off by projectile vomiting all over the ice luge.
she kept asking for a lobster dinner while she was crying. it was actually the most reasonable drunk chick request i've ever heard.
Sounds like it could have been the night you pulled out your love stump at the strip club.
Why is there a water bottle full of red wine on my desk this morning?
See you tonight.
Just saw the ex while I was at CVS at 3am buying Depends for my heavy flow
My mom just walked in on me naked taking a shit and packing a bowl...the only comment she makes is, she wants her Tupperware back after my pot's out of it. Best mom ever.
I can't even be mad at customs in houstons airport anymore for missing my flight and having to stay overnight. Within an hour of meeting we did it at her place. Her last word being "glad I could show you real southern hospitality". I'm definitely coming back here someday
Not my fault people bought me shots. waving a shot in my face is like waving a cock in yours
The last time we went to a costume party, you walked around in a loincloth with a cross and said you were Jesus. I'm eager to see how much more offensive you can be.
Randomize
