At first I felt shameful, waking up naked next to a box of oreos and half a can of cake frosting...then I realized, this could be a bigger discovery than Atlantis.
Just saw someone buying TWO six packs of O'Doul's. WHY ??
he keeps calling me but I'm too scared to answer... Not sure what he's gonna yell at me for: barging into his room while he was with another girl, filling her shoes with dog food and water, or hiding his keys in the garbage disposal.....
Her parties are sponsored by Valtrex. This might not be your best idea.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
update. expensive tequila only makes the mistakes more expensive.
My sister was not impressed when she got here. I was standing in the doorway in my underwear drinking a beer. At 2pm. On a Monday.
Tell me not to purchase 500 ball pit balls and a kiddy pool
No
I just looked at your pics on Facebook....there was cake? Where the fuck was I!?
Just beer bonged tequila, broke into the hotel next door and got chased by security. It's spring break
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The last thing I remember from that party was me shouting "hold my feet I'm going in strapped like Rambo"
Like its not even midnight and I've already had enough of her for all of 2015
You can't talk like Dr. Evil to me five minutes after the greatest orgasm of my life.
Her boyfriend offered to buy me a vibrator. I'm not sure how to feel about that.
It's beautiful. It's what jesusxwants. I should send you a pic of my boobs out of friendship
I like how I can go from sucking dick in the my basement to singing along to veggie tales with my family in a span of 10 minutes.
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