i need a lesbian romance or unplanned pregnancy for some spicein my life.
at least after i hook up with someone i have the decency to ignore them
I gave her a mint afterward. It felt like giving turndown service at Hotel BJ.
Get in the lobby, you have to sign my boxers
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Now one day I will be able to tell my children how a drag queen in a gay bar told mommy that bin laden was dead
I'm not sure what happened. But I must have won because I obviously stole two full pitchers of beer from the bar and taped a note on them saying "your welcome"
I am broke enough to accept it. If I get poisoned, you can have my shoes
How much did you drink?
Enough to be hungover and still think roller coasters were a good idea
This is why Helen Keller didn't drink
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We woke up at 7:30am. We got a 30 rack, yelled at all the freshman shackers walkin back to their dorms, played a game of beer die, and boned all before 11:00am. I found my soulmate
Whoever put salsa in the kiddie pool.....your an ass. Fuck you.
I'm not gonna lie. I'm a little scared.
Good. The Jell-O shots look great.
Just bumped into my ex. Blowing a dude in the ladies' room at Disney World. I guess it really was her not me.
you could be the only one getting laid right now....yet your sitting in here making goat noises
Ya that dick wasn't worth burning a perfectly good pizza.
You live and learn.
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