Okay just took the preggers test..and im NOT! :)
awesome babe! drinks tonight!
Wait does the happy face mean yes? fuck.
Hey when I die alone will you come by often enough so that my cats don’t eat my face?
And i was thinking, 'i'm happy to be underneath you, but i wish you weren't doing THAT.'
well when i got there she was attempting to stick the cat in her mouth.. so maybe you should go check on her
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
remeber the saying "bad choices make good memories" dude our bad choices dont even make memories.
you made your own hammock out of a towel and duct tape.
She looks like a junkie muppet...awful
Today has been the most awkward masturbatory day of my life. Possibly even more awkward than when my mom found my vibrator on Mother's Day.
MEET ME OUTSIDE YOUR HOUSE IN THREE MINUTES. BE DRUNK. THIS IS NOT A DRILL.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
That dog was the best thing i ever touched
Did u smell a guys dreadlocks in the McDonald's drive thru line last night or did I dream that?
I honestly think she should have her own reality show called "Lowering the Bar" and it consists of a camera crew following her from Bar to bar hooking up with unsuspecting drunk attractive men.
When she tells her friend, "hey I'll be back tomorrow, just going to fuck a guy", right in front of you, you know you've got a winner.
You told me you were trying to learn all the MLB ballparks while you waited for your porn to load.
And somehow i feel like your expectations will turn out to be illegal in some way.
Randomize