I did a mental Irish jig when he pulled out the second condom.
The whole way homeyou were flapping your arms up and down, and when I asked why you said you were trying to tell Tony Danza about the angels.
doesn't matter. i just recorded the power rangers theme song on my phone. and its loud. was thinking we could use it as our entrance song as we walk into bars.
random question: do you know anywhere in the tri-state that has elephant racing? this is a work related question.
His dick looked like E.T.'s finger. It scared me.
Remember that crazy chick I've been ignoring and said I wouldn't bang her again? Can we start that again part today?
My glasses smell like tequila. I just put them on and almost threw up.
She said to bring taco sauce. Hoping that's a euphemism.
Periouds do not concern me. Biploogival needs are buological needs.
I lied. Can't workout today. Only exercises I'm currently capable of doing are breathing ones to keep last night's drinks ending up all over the classroom.
I'm serious-it was like trying to deep-throat a minivan.
I woke up naked with my work shoes on
I just realized it's officially fall..I had sex while watching Halloween
Well he had a nice beard and it smelled good so there was no way I wasn’t going home with him.
Dad hid the hash somewhere in my room and wont tell me where it is until i clean it. My room is spotless. The hash was on the ceiling fan...
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