when my dick couldnt get hard she said "fly on little wing"
Her parents hate her and she's on like major lockdown. All her friends are in jail and she has massive pit stains. Dude... It doesn't get much worse than that.
Its like we are women, and boise state is a gangster rap song. This game is degrading
i just realized i have an entire drawer dedicated to the clothes of guys ive shacked with...
My gynecologist just commented on how well my vagina was waxed
we didnt even have break up sex...
you had it for us with someone else...
so when our kids ask "when did you know you loved mommy?" you're gonna say "when she sent me emoticons about slobbing on my knob?"
I'm not going to be your wingman while you are in the hospital.
UPDATE: IM NOT A TEEN MOM LETS GO PARTY
You also spilled beer on my dog and tried to wipe it off with a paper towel but he kept getting away from you.
He looks like an accountant with a secret kinky candy filled center.
GO RIDE HIS EYEBROWS INTO THE SUNSET
I want to eat a stick of butter
Did your pain meds kick in?
It tastes nice
Three times. Three times I left home yesterday in search for sex, and three times I returned un-orgasmed.
I just drunkenly emailed my feminist dissertation as a resignation letter for my call center job. What am I doing with my life!?
Randomize
