rainy day on campus = new personal fetish for girls in booty shorts and colorful rain boots
No, he will live forever, like cockroaches and Jack Bauer.
Literally just stood in the shower and forgot what to do. that hungover.
You know you had good weekend wheb we you hook up with three different girls and you don't feel no pain when u pee in the morning
this will be a night to untag.
We had phone sex and he came in his sink. i will never eat off one of his plates again
I don't know what kind of soup they made, but it smells like condoms.
Idk, you were a drunk pirate that kept stealing pieces of people's costumes to keep as your booty.
That would explain all the random shit in my room...
Is it inception if it feels like another uterus is going to burst out of my current uterus?
I told her to to let go of her rationtal thoughts and just enjoy the fact that i was going down on her till she passed out from sheer orgasmic pleasure.
COME HERE AND I WILL SUCK YOUR COCK UNDER THE LIGHT OF THIS BEAUTIFUL ELECTRICITY
You're not talking any sense into me. You're cheering me on to disaster.
... is that not half the reason I'm your best friend in the first place?
Everyone should just give me a copy of their keys. I take your dog out and I bring beer.
If God is analyzing my life right now extremely proud or dissapointed but either way I took wednesday night drinkin to new levels
Consume your own penis you ugly freak.
Randomize
