It was ok at first, but now im getting freaked out by him jerking off to me doing yoga
Alright, so what's my next move? I already posted a Milli Vanilli video on her wall
At some point we were all eating banana flavored rolling papers.
Is there a fine for having sex in the back of a zipcar?
If i want her back i know all i have to do is sleep with a specific handful of her closest friends. That method is tried and true.
My teacher just let our class out 30 minutes early, its a 50 minute class. He said the only thing we had to do was get fucked up tonight and have stories about it on Monday.
There was so much jailbait at the festival that there was no other option but to drink my morals away
Just saw our highschool guidance counselor at the bar and he's taken six shots in the last hour. Those teenagers have fucking hardened him.
What section do you want to sit in? The screaming girls section or the "when you guys were popular I was straight and pretended not to like you guys" section?
I just opened a pickle jar stoned as fuck. I clapped for myself. I feel like wonder woman.
I support your vibrator fueled lifestyle.
That reminds me of the morning I woke up on the sidewalk covered in chicken wings
So, I ran into Garrett last night in the laundry room.
Oh really? First post break-up run in. How'd it go? Awkward?
Um. We had sex on a washing machine.
I wish period tracker had a "on this day" also so i can see who i was with this day last year.
Yeah. We're taking this fuck buddy relationship to the next level. Sober weekday sex.
Randomize
