what do you mean I googled how to give an awesome blow job?
THEY SHOULD WARN YOU WHEN THEY MAKE JELLO SHOTS WITH JACK DANIELS!!! THEY SHOULD WARN YOU!!!!!!!
Its like fucking yourself in the head with a weed strapon
So here i am dipping ice cream in my vodka and watching the bad girls club on demand. This is not ok
Its like every time I go out with you, it always involves Serbian chicks and taco bell and you always manage to get both all over my bed.
It was smashing those cupcakes into my face that did it. Junk food and I don't mix.
You passed out while holding my hair during a blow job.. i think your gona have to earn back blow jobs
Although I feel like awkward kinda describes your entire sexual history...
We couldve played the bring a random boy to lunch game but i made him go home
I suggest absurd amounts of masturbation this weekend to build up the necessary calluses
We were high as shit. We argued for like ten minutes about going to Dunkin Donuts and then just ended up rolling down hills. Thanks for the weed.
Terrible hangover + phoenix airport + pizza hut....I think I might have entered one of the levels of hell.
I would say I miss her friendship, then I remember that she gave 4 guys the clap. I'm good.
best way to lose double chin? blow jobs. I am fucking hurting.
Whoever said it shouldn't take a man to make you happy clearly wasn't having sex everyday.
Randomize
