You guys sftrill at mcdondalds?!!!!
Yes.
fuckin bring me a cheseburgeria
You missed a lot. I drank contact solution thinking it was water, vodka thinking it was water and some unidentified substance that reminded me of pine sol thinking it was water..
We were thinking he might be gay. Like how the fuck do you not even make out with a girl that made you a grilled cheese
I'm silent, like a masturbating ninja.
I got pulled into the conversation by "she sleeps with everybody" then "she" involved sleeping with "cocks the size of a viva burrito"
That dog was the best thing i ever touched
My boss just told me not to come back to work if I decide to drink. Challenge accepted.
I'm mortified. After he finished, he turned to me and said,"So, what did you think of my mom?" WTF Please tell me he was not wondering about that while he was going down on me!!!
I know I've wanted to fuck him for the past month, but when you're that hungover, the only chemistry you have is with a pillow and a gallon of water.
And your boyfriend doesn't mind you constantly taking pictures of his dick just to freak out your brother?
its more like he's accepted that he can't stop me
250 people in this lecture & my prof asks who already drank green beer this morning& is drunk right now. I WAS THE ONLY ONE TO RAISE MY HAND
.......he just venmo charged me for the burrito I was eating while he broke up with me
This drink tastes like mosquito repellent.
How much of a thot would I be if I put this pic up? On a scale of thot-ish to Queen of Thotlandia
i can feel my liver failing just LOOKING at that thing
Randomize
